Welcome to the Southern Pinwheel Galaxy (Day 3)

[Sjet]

[Amanda Rose]

[Sjet]

[Amanda Rose]

[KendleRJ]

Dr. Talia Flowers observed the exchange with some dispassion as if Gary and Arkady were specimens instead of people. She stepped back reflexively, as if the two men might hose the deck plates with some form of bodily fluid.

She had even watched Gary and Mary retreat to bolster each other after the verbal attack. Classic behaviour she had observed between a variety of sentient species.
And then it was her turn as she watched the Doctor also leave. Alone. She chewed on her thumb nail in thought before heading off with the Captain. "At your convenience, Sir," she mumured before following him to their place of meeting.

Gary moved Talia to the meeting room next door and allowed the doors to close behind them as he took a seat. He stretched out his arm indicating that she should sit down, as well. He carefully watched her to see where she chose to sit. After all, such a small thing could tell a lot about a person's unconscious and where their mind might be.

Flicking her eyes over the choices, Talia sat directly across from the Captain. She placed her PADD, still running its calculations, on the table between them and met his eyes easily. "Thank you, Sir," she said formally but her demeanor screamed casual.

Gary internally frowned. Directly across from him meant confrontational attitude. Did that mean she sided with Arkady or she was upset about something. Best to feel out the situation.

Gary moved seats to one over, trying to demonstrate a non-aggressive and more friendly environment. He did not want to overdo it by moving next to her because that might be too familiar for Talia.

Flowers turned her head slightly, the position different as he moved. Her motivations had more to do with convenience and less to do with position, but after the run in with the Doctor... perceptions might be different.

Shrugging, she said simply, "Stress can do strange things to people." She waited a beat before continuing.

"There's a lot of blame flying around, Captain," she said insightfully, noting his posture. "Unfortunately, the Commander is not alone in its acceptance. Every one of her team shares it... as do I." She looked down for a moment. "I was on the Bridge. If I had been more observant, faster... done more..." She shrugged. "You see? We all are in our own places of hurt and shame, Captain. I can share my observations, but I'm afraid it'll be coloured by my own sense of guilt."

"Ultimately, Ensign, any blame lies with me. I am the Captain and the safety of this crew and ship are my primary responsibilities." Giving Talia a sympathetic smile, he continued, "But we can go up and down the chain of command blaming each and every action we have taken since birth that led us to this moment. It does no good. We have to deal with the now because the past is already written. Unfortunately, there are some that will continue to live there. Let's just hope that the past does not strangle the present."

"Indeed," she said, her eyes distant for a moment. "You do understand that the Doctor has made some rather interesting points regarding command structure." She waited a moment, keeping her voice neutral. "Because we are now completely cut off from Starfleet, some might get it into their heads to challenge authority, or to question command or even to take matters into their own hands. Because survival is a driving force, not because one might wish to mutiny."

She kept her eyes steadily on his, not breaking the contact. Her voice was low and reasonable, her eyes calm and open. "It would be foolish to ignore such things or discount their possibility." She waited a moment. "Please don't imagine for one moment that I intend on putting my own survival above the rest of the Crew. Because that would be folly, Sir."

She shrugged again, and gnawed on her thumb nail as a particularly odd waveform crossed the screen on her PADD which diverted her attention briefly, before meeting the Captain's eyes once more.

"A structure is needed, strength of character, and a firm sense of integrity. But working together is the only way we can survive out here. Or expect to have a shot at getting home."

She smiled. "You know, if you expect the impossible, you might be surprised when someone finds a way to give it to you."

Gary laughed. "You're something else, you know that? Are you sure that you are not an engineer by trade? Let me tell you an engineer's trademark secret. We always allow for some error so that when our Captain asks for the impossible, we can deliver it."

His face then soured a bit. "However, in this case, our structural integrity is not sound. We would not last through another trip through a worm hole barring repairs and there is no star base nearby, is there? Frankly, I am a bit surprised we survived, let alone this intact. Had I not made the last minute decision to throw us into forward warp, we likely would not be having this conversation."

He put his hands on the table and one of his palms flipped upward as he continued talking, "Arkady may or may not intend a mutiny but many will hear what he is saying that way. However, let us think about what you are saying for a moment from a logical perspective. If we are stuck here and we were to abandon Starfleet structure, what would we have and how would it work? This is still a military exploration vessel. Decisions have to be made regarding its use, right? Theoretically, the Captain is best positioned to do that. No? Do you think that you could run this ship? Then there's the entire issue with mob mentality and fear.... The Starfleet structure keeps us with something that we can all relate to and may comfort quite a few people that still have hope. To abandon it now would be somewhat dangerous and destroy hope. Do you not agree?"

Talia smirked. "Captain. Structure is the cornerstone of our survival." She impulsively slapped the palm of his hand playfully and then pulled her PADD closer to her, still watching the readings. That same pulse crossed the screen and she began capturing it for indepth analysis.

"You misunderstood my own position... because I'm not interested in leading anyone. It's bad enough I have to follow someone else's rules... but I logically accept that they exist for safety, security, and commonality."

Her smirk widened into a grin. "Something has to exist in order to keep everyone going, Sir. And logically speaking, with your training and experience, you are already our leader. With assistance and buy in from every Department and Department head as well. It's what we've all trained for, accepted when we came aboard, and frankly, I might not agree with everything, but I too understand that I'm not really supposed to. I don't have the full picture... only my own personal corner of it."

Her eyes became unfocussed as she recalled the meeting and her own observations of it. "We're all scared, Sir. Afraid of the future, of the next minute, and even the next breath." She smiled widely, tension draining from her face. "But what's new about that? Isn't that just the human condition?"

She shook her head, more to clear her thoughts than to negate anything she'd said up to now. Or the Captain had either, for that matter. "We adapt. It's why we've survived to cross the stars. We'll adapt here too... this change is going to be painful for those who find it hard to accept it, but to be honest, Sir... what the hell business do they have out here in space in the first place then?" Her laugh was short, like a bark. "There were no guarantees about anything when we came aboard. We're forging new frontiers... and now, when we're smack dab in the middle of the biggest one, we're just supposed to crack? Seems a mite reactionary to me..."

Gary wondered why Talia slapped his hand but he determined that he was starting to like this Ensign. She had a very logical mind and it seemed that she would be extremely well suited towards some of his more far reaching ideas which would be necessary if the human race was going to survive out here. Some, like Mary, he knew would likely get used to them but hate them. Yet, there was little to be done. The genetic pool would have to be broadened as much as possible. Monogamy, would no longer be a luxury. But that was a conceptual thought for another day when reality became more apparent to the survivors.

"Indeed, Ensign, we will have to adapt. And, I should like to hear your ideas on how to do it at some point in the not so distant future. May I inquire as to your background?"

Talia shrugged. "I'm a Doctor of Linguistics. But also have studied and pursued a career in Xenosociology, and Xenoanthropology. And have some serious survival training in all sorts of environments... Why?"

Gary joked, "So you're a cunning linguist and you are flexible as to beings and places."

Talia gigglesnorted unself-consciously. "Mayyyyybe," she said and laughed harder. "Not adverse to trying... but was married too." Her eyes sparkled with a bit of a twist. "I guess that DOES make me flexible... doesn't it?"

Gary nodded. "I'm sorry for your probable loss, Ensign. Though, I have often wondered how marriages survive the long distance and the time apart. It must be extremely difficult. Though, I must admit that you seem to be handling it better than I would expect most would."

She chuckled. "He and I haven't seen each other in well over 6 years... one day I woke up, and he wasn't there." She shrugged. "So missing him? Maybe if I had been a better wife... or even a wife at all? I don't know... But it's too long now to even wonder..."

She retreated into herself thoughtfully. "But sometimes, I still do."

Gary sympathized. "At least your spouse did not have an incurable mental illness. There's only so much that one can take before it becomes too much." Gary's voice became softer as he reminisced. "At any rate, we can't dwell on the past. We have problems here and you, Ensign, are likely the most important person on the ship."

Talia followed the conversation and saw a side of the Captain, and had some insight into him and his lifestyle. It couldn't have been easy at all. With her, she simply carried on in the field, and threw herself into her work.

"Most important person on the ship?" she repeated as though she'd missed part of the conversation completely. While her PADD continued the recording, she blinked at him owlishly.

"Yes, most important person on the ship. Do you not see it?"

Talia narrowed her eyes and considered things, and then shrugged. "Actually, no I don't, Captain." She coloured slightly, a slight blush on her darker cheeks. "I'm usually quite good at this, but I think I'm just a little preoccupied to consider such a thing."

"We are in another galaxy. You can speak a plethora of languages and have experience with other species and cultures. You are the most qualified person on this ship to introduce us to another civilization or culture if it exists out here. Of course, if you say or do the wrong thing, it could cause us all to get killed.... No pressure," he told her with a smile.

"So, no pressure then," she replied lightly. "Assuming there is some sort of..." her PADD interrupted her.

"Look, Sir. I've been monitoring this system and there's a recurring signal that I've been tracking from this quadrant." She brought the PADD closer to her and pointed it out to him. "I don't know if it's anything worth investigating, but it's regular, and quite probably made by beings of some intelligence." She shrugged.

"I have it earmarked for analysis." Looking at him with a grin, she nearly chuckled. "So, we might see if I can kill us all sooner rather than later, perhaps."

"We already have this galaxy divided in quadrants?" Gary asked laughing at the industrious Ensign. "You're absolutely certain that it is not of any naturally occurring phenomenon like a pulsar?"

Talia grinned and nodded. "The frequency range is too low. Unless of course the Universe has deemed it fit to make its naturally occurring anomalies fit into the human broadcast range of communication."

She blushed a little. "Assuming of course that such a rule would hold true all the way out here. But it's statistically likely to be sentient related rather than natural. But I expect both are possible." She sucked her teeth thoughtfully.

"It could be nothing at all; but I have it set for analysis."

"Prioritize it, Ensign and for now, keep this between us. I do not want to unnecessarily excite anyone. I need to know what this signal is, what it is saying and whether we can approach whatever is there. We have nowhere to go for repairs and no idea what is out here. We need to be absolutely certain of what we're doing before we do anything. Eavesdrop if you can." He grinned at Talia and said, "If it was at all appropriate, I would kiss you right now. Did I not tell you that you were the most important person on the ship?"

She laughed, her face brightening considerably. "Will do, Sir," she replied. "And thank you for the thought, but maybe when we get to know each other better."
She looked down at her PADD and was instantly absorbed in the waveform. "Important, maybe... busy?" She looked up at him, and smiled. "You understand that, Sir. Busy? Always."

"Get to know each better?" Gary sized up the Ensign. She was attractive but at first she was so business-like. Likely, this was just humor, he decided, so he played along. "Indeed, we will be getting to know each other much better with the amount of time we will be spending together." He watched as Talia became absorbed in the PADD.

"Always busy?" he inquired confused.

Talia smile widely. "Captain. I look forward to it. And as for being busy? You're the Captain of the only starship in this system. I can't imagine you are anything but."
Her finger tapped the PADD and the view shifted. "I've a few dozen signals and a myriad of low frequency signals to analyse. So, I too am a bit busy." She purposely understated her role.

"I am going to be even more busy given the nature of our current situation. But you, my dear, Ensign Flowers, are going to be seeing me a great deal. I need you to tell me whatever you need to sort out this signal and I will help make it happen for you."

"Nothing rivalling your burdens, Sir. But well... I believe that you need to be open to a lot of considerations when looking at human conditions in unique survival situations." Talia nodded slowly.

"I look forward to it, Sir. And will let you know what I need or find out as I proceed."

"Ensign Flowers, first, may I call you by your first name in private?

"Talia, Captain. Of course."

"Talia, thank you. If you wish, you may call me Gary in private. I think you would be rather surprised at what I have and continue to consider when dealing with our potential for survival. As I said, my responsibility is the crew and ship first. I take it seriously. The only issue is having others see the other options and not having them rejected due to them being unconventional. But that is for another day, Talia."

She nodded and said, "Of course, Gary." There was no hesitation in her voice, and it didn't seem to bother her using his given name. "Let me get right on the signal analysis, and perhaps address other survival concerns on that other day."

She smiled easily, and then turned her attention to the PADD as she stood fluidly. "I promise to get back to you on this, hopefully in the next few hours." She began muttering as her fingers flew over the screen. "No one has used this frequency in hundreds of years on Earth... I wonder...." her voice trailed off as she began walking out and then stopped abruptly.

"Oh. Are we done here?"

"We're done. Just let me know anything the moment you know something. I don't care what I am doing. You are my top priority. Understand?"

"Thanks, Gary," Talia said, now absorbed in the analysis, and only partially aware of her surroundings. "I promise I'll be in touch."

Gary stood up and said, "You're dismissed. If you wish to stay here for your analysis, you may. Up to you. I, have to coordinate now with others."

He spoke to an empty room as the door slid shut behind the Ensign.

(This was a JP brought to you by Ensign Talia Flowers (KendleRJ) and Captain Gary Alexander (Amanda Rose) and the letter Q. Just 'cause.)

Tags All

[Sjet]

Arkady was not angry. You could not be angry at the stones of a rock slide, or the careless swell of the rushing tide: it was a thing that acted of its own nature without oversight. Just like strange galaxy connecting anomalies. Just like human stupidity. He had hoped…

What had he hoped? That bringing to light the secret shame of a survivor's guilt in a fellow veteran would show that he was on Gary’s side? That in highlighting the possible change in the power structure of the Horizon he might somehow let Gary navigate its troubled waters to a safe harbour? Of course Gary had discounted his opinion, and seen it as a challenge to his authority: Starfleet had rules and regulation concerning such things, and they must be followed dogmatically. Never mind that the nearest board of inquiry was the better part of a hundred million light years away. Arkady had no doubt that had Gary wanted to he would have ordered his arrest.

As though simply locking a problem away would work now? As though anything they had brought with them from the Milky Way would work now in this strange land.

“Zuby vse druz'ya drug s drugom.” he whispered quietly to himself as he stood before the closed door of the turbolift, waiting for it to arrive and whisk him back to medical.

Ensign Flowers, fresh out of her meeting with the Captain, nose buried in her PADD rounded the corner, barely aware of her surroundings. She was busy tapping out the waveform, and muttering under her breath. Her 5’ 4” frame was on the move and barrelled headlong into something that wasn’t a bulkhead.

She glanced up in some surprise, and she smiled warmly. “Dr. Sjet,” she said. “I didn’t see you there. Sorry about that, I’m sure.” She sized him up, and noted his posture. “I’m on my way to my quarters. Do you mind sharing the lift when it gets here? Unless of course, you’d rather be alone with your Russian thoughts.” She grinned widely, not a single patronising expression on her face. “It was a rather… interesting meeting. I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

“You are not intruding. I and my thoughts travel lightly these days.” he smiled as warmly as he could, knowing that he had a face that could freeze water if he frowned just right. It wasn’t that he was a downer or a particularly dower sort of person: he was merely the stereotypical stoic Russian. Smiling took calories, and calories were what kept you warm on cold nights.

“Please, you may join me if you like. I would enjoy hearing how the meeting was interesting when so much of what was said is fact generally known to all.” he enquired.

“Thank you, Doctor,” she said genially. “I found the meeting itself interesting because I’d never actually noticed how narrow-minded some people can be. Or how idealistic.” She shrugged, and sucked her teeth for a moment. “Unfortunately, denying the baser instincts of humanity will not make them go away.” She touched his arm gently and then slid her fingers over her PADD once more.
“But also, assuming that people who have signed up to go headlong into space must somehow fold under pressure at the first possible opportunity.” She shrugged. “What kinds of criteria have people needed to go through in order to be aboard? Surely they’re not expected to fall apart in a crisis. That would be detrimental to the ship regardless of the galaxy arm we ended up in, nyet?”

“You miss the point entirely. The psychological tests and models used to determine someones viability for a long term space expedition are all well and good. But you forget quickly that this was to be a five year mission. Two and a half years out, two and half years back. And the return leg would have seen us running into Federation space sooner than we left thanks to the colonial programs that were being funded when we left.” Arkady explained patiently, fingers drumming on the computer tablet gently “Everyone made plans for what they would do when they get home. See family, loved ones, or home again. All those tests were based on the idea of a return to our homes.”

He looked at her out of the corner of one eye.

“Would you say those tests are now based on a very shaky premise? This galaxy if it is to be prison will be one for life. Some people will accept that, will embrace that new frontier.” he shrugged “Others will not. In those people I find great trouble in predicting their behaviours: is why I want ships venting protocol for fire control restricted A-S-A-P.”

He said each letter separately, not in the lassy asap or ASAP but in a slow steady accented mantra of thing.

Talia nodded slowly as she listened, knowing full well how quickly people’s personalities could change in the face of certainty, or uncertainty as the case might be. And some could accept change, while others? They could crack beneath the strain of things. Just because she had no one of real consequence left behind didn’t mean that others didn’t. The ones whose lives had changed profoundly in the blink of an eye according to their perception, for the worst, could be capable of anything, really.

Her studies had taken her far into the realm of human psyche, and also alien species. Even rats backed into a corner were dangerous. And weren’t they all rats of one sort or another? Not a very favourable comparison, but one that was in her own head.

“I believe, Doctor, that the tests will need to be evaluated to be better suited to any situation, regardless of how impossible they might seem.” She sighed audibly and looked up, considering. “I don’t imagine my needing constant monitoring with respect to abhorrent or destructive behaviour, but I can see, when pressed to it, others would definitely need it.” She wasn’t surprised or disappointed, but comfortably detached from such observations.

“Some people will require protection. Some will require compassion. While others will need… something much harsher.” She sighed deeper, and cocked her head sideways, considering. “I don’t envy anyone the decisions to come…”

“They are decisions we should be making together: not choices dictated to us by a select few.” Arkady bit out, before curling his lip into a snarl and seeming to mentally chiding himself for the outburst. He shook his head and looked up at the still glowing ‘In Transit’ icon over the top of the turbolift door. “My apologies for my words, I did not mean to speak harshly to you. It has been a ‘strange day’, no?”

He let out a small chuff of a laugh.

“But you are right. Some will need our compassion, and our understanding. Others, I fear, will show a more aggressive behaviour: lashing out at those they perceive to be the cause of their new reality. That might be as mild as verbal assault, or it could mean a technician in the communication section attempting to short out the magnetic bottle of the antimatter containment chamber. No amount of of regulation or Starfleet stiff upper lip will stop a person deranged by loss from doing what they see as the only option left available to them.”

Talia shook her head slowly. “You don’t have to apologise to me, Doctor,” she said simply. “Never consider passion in your opinions to be something you need to concern yourself with me at least.” She shrugged. “Starfleet is simply a command structure which provides a framework. I’m good with it, regardless of its intricacy of rules that I don’t always like. And unfortunately, the moment we open up the choices to everyone’s opinion, nothing might truly be accomplished either.”

It was a slippery slope they climbed. Or slid down. Depending upon perspective and of course, personal integrity. “I agree with diligence, but by saying that, I don’t agree with hunting shadows either. How do we draw the line between reality, perception, and a good old-fashioned witch hunt? Allies gathered; fears making strange bedfellows. Who’s to be the logical voice of reason? And how do we judge its validity?”

“Do I know? I do not. I am doctor, I make diagnosis and propose treatment. I do not make promises.” he intoned gravely “But I do not see the wisdom is carrying on as though nothing has happened. And whilst the idea of opening this ships destiny to the will of the entire crew does not kindle in me some embers of a Marxist upbringing, it is folly. A ship requires a singular focus for its decisions: requires captain. My worry is that captain will not accept any council but his own when he should listen to the will of his crew, of his comrades in this common endeavor.”

He took in a breath and shook his head.

“As for your second worry of the shadow of hunted, and price that will have to be paid for it? That will come sooner than you think. Someone will do something, say something, reminding someone of their loss: someone will break. When they do...bad things will happen.” he looked at the doctrine weidling scientist “What do you think we should do when that happens? Criminal law was never my...speciality.”

Well from this side of the gavel anyway.

“We will have a choice soon to place those that cannot play well with others in cages, and guard them and feed them like pet.” he looked at one hand, and then flipped it over slowly “Or maybe we take page from early Mars colonies. If you steal a man’s air, his food, or his transport whilst out on The Red: very simple justice required. Do you think Gary would pass such a test if he had to perform such a thing to one of his crew?”

“Bad things have already happened,” Flowers said softly. “I’ve witnessed two reasonable men to completely miss what the other is meaning. Both of you have the fate of the crew first and foremost in your minds and in your hearts.” She looked up, her green eyes open and compassionate. “I’m afraid for us all when someone breaks… it’s like living on the precipice of an eroding shore.”

She cast her mind and thoughts back to the possibilities of the pasts she had so painstakingly studied. “And I am unsure about a few things. Especially if we consider our resources… our FINITE resources,” she corrected herself, “to be one of the few things we have for us all.” Her thumbnail went into her mouth and she ground her teeth against it as she thought. “We could go back to martial law, to a time when everything was so restricted that nothing and no one could move without permission, or observation. Because everything is considered precious. Except for freedom. How much are we willing to sacrifice in order to live, Doctor?”

She held up a hand as she tucked her PADD under her arm, ticking each one off on her fingers as she spoke. “Integrity? Morality? Faith? I know they’re obscure concepts in the face of the very basic idea of simply living… but how much can we live with? Executing transgressors? To save our precious resources for the rest who are capable of obeying the laws? And which laws might those be? Because anything aboard this ship could be considered life-threatening… stealing rations, redirecting energy, staying up past an expected or enforced curfew… breathing extra… and what if someone becomes ill, Doctor? That could threaten environmentals, and the health of the entire crew…”

“How objective do we get? How unfeeling? And if the Captain must ensure these things are exe… meted out, then his popularity might plummet, and the willingness of the crew to follow him might be severely compromised.” How might such decisions affect him? His crew? The Doctor? The accused? Was she speaking aloud or simply thinking… “This is an intricate issue, one I think won’t be decided outside of a turbolift.” Her eyes twinkled softly as she smiled.

“No.” he said with a smile, placing a hand onto the turbolift door and patting the cool metal “It will be decided by all of us. It will be choice made for common survival: cooperation instead of competition. You are right to worry about what parts of our humanity we will be willing to throw away in the name of survival. But you will find joy in what we decide we must keep for ourselves. On Mars, in the early days when the Red Planet was cut off from Earth by the Third World War, they all thought that they were it. That if they did not survive, did not thrive, the human race would end with them. It is a burden to bare, is it not? There were tragedies, misunderstanding and...terrible, irredeemable mistakes.”

His lips thinned as he thought upon his history.

“But in the end they were stronger for it: like steel broken but annealed by fire and made stronger for the hardship.” he said with a firm nod “We will have to make choices when we make our own mistakes, when people break. But that first one, the first criminal we find, will have to be dealt with harshly but in only one fashion: we must all have a hand in his judgement. What decision we make, we must all have our hands blooded by its outcome. The only way through to the future now is together, and we can no longer afford to hold up sacrificial leaders to use as shields.”

He turned and looked at her directly, those cold eyes bright and fierce as the newly born stars that shone in the alien skies beyond the hull.

“We must be ready to turn to our neighbour and say ‘you made me do it’. We must all have blame and shame for the justice that must be handed down to those that would see us killed.” he said firmly “We must become a nation unto ourselves if we are to make this new galaxy our home. We cannot do that if we are so tied to old ways that have no meaning here.”

Talia saw something within those eyes, and met them without compromise. “But we must be true to ourselves, Doctor.” She said it softly and stronger than anything else she had said thus far. “I’m not sure if I’d be happy to have the blood of my fellow crew members on my hands.” Her eyes clouded over. “Not everything washes clean. And although the blood might not be visible, some things leave a stain on the soul.” Her hand reached out for a moment and then pulled back, as though crossing a great divide. It was a gesture that she questioned, and shrugged inwardly. Perhaps she had just explained the Doctor’s concerns.

Shared burdens were lighter, but certainly no easier. But he was right. There was no use in denying the human tendency to violence. “Someone is going to break. And when we decide… what happens. That will be setting a precedent for everything that comes after.” No matter what it was to be. “I’m not sure how much I can live with. But I know I want to live.” She shrugged. “But if we find something… here… Acting too quickly might prove to be even more detrimental than waiting.”

It made her heart ache. It made her gut ache. And her head too. “I can’t imagine what you lived through Doctor, or what you’ve been living with. But we share the same air, the same space, and the same burdens.”

“But not the same weight on our shoulders.” Arkady let out in a gruff little huff of air, before looking at Talia out of the corner of his eye. His appearance softened slightly, becoming a little reproachful at his attitude before “I apologise. You were not yet in Starfleet then, not yet able to serve. I should not expect the same dedication to ensuring past mistakes are not repeated. The preservation of tradition.”

With a musical ‘ding’ the turbolift car opened, revealing the somewhat snug interior. Arkady glanced into it, and then smiled and gestured for her to enter.

“Please, you have this car. I will make a walk of my return: it will do me good to stretch my legs. I can check in with a few departments I have yet to touch base with since our arrival.” he said as he took a step back, smiling at her “And should you have need of my services as doctor or counsellor, my door is always open.”

TAG-Amyone who wants to walk a little with the good doctor.

A JP by Dr Sjet and Dr Flowers

[KendleRJ]

Kat tapped in a brief message to the Captain after she'd finished with the Commander. 'Ready for a meeting, Captain. Let me know where and when.'

The reply was immediate, "Meeting room B, KAT. Ready for you now."

'Heading over' and she was as good as her word. It took very little time for her to get there, and she took a deep breath before stepping forward, to trigger the door. She squeezed her right hand beneath her PADD and put on as honest a smile as she could manage.

Gary watched as KAT entered the room. He had known her long enough to know that she was more than a little concerned and was putting on a brave face. His PADD was sitting on the table with notes as to what he was going to announce to the crew. "That good?" he asked.

She leaned over and read it, leaning on the conference table. "Yes, Captain. That works." She nodded briefly, and met his eyes. "It looks good and reads well."

"I think it still needs a bit of something but I'll get it right soon." He sighed. "Some meeting today, huh?"

"Something?" Kat asked. "Maybe take out all of the fancy words and speak from your heart, Sir. It's not a formal missive... it's a message that people are waiting on."

She nodded slowly. "It was one hell of a meeting, if you don't mind my saying so, Captain." She squeezed her PADD tightly in her left hand. "I took a lot of notes... and have to compile a full transcript along with my observations..." The whisp of a smile crossed her lips.

"That's my girl!" he told KAT proudly. "And I will speak from the heart. You know that's all I really know how to do, anyways. But, if you squeeze that PADD any harder, you're going to be buying it." He snickered slightly.

Kat nodded and smiled wider, and sat suddenly in the chair in front of the PADD. "It hasn't broken yet, no matter how hard I've tried. So it must be Kat-proof."
She looked up at him and tried to relax. "I'm guessing there's more to this meeting than me looking over your speech?"

"You know me well," Gary said giving KAT a large smile. "I want to hear first what you thought of the meeting and how it played out."

She nodded curtly and leaned back in the chair, taking a deep breath and gathering her thoughts. "The meeting was..." Closing her eyes for a moment, she brought up the visions of the fight that almost broke out in front of her. Between the Captain and the Doctor... and she wasn't certain what might have happened.

She'd seen what Sjet was capable of with the Engineers down below.

"It was... something that could have gone either way," she said softly. "Two people, feeling so deeply about things at each other's throats." She glanced at the door. "And he attacked your XO verbally. I can understand your reaction to that as well."

Kat smiled and and looked at him. "Chivalry isn't dead. At least in this part of the galaxy..."

Gary gave a snort of derision. "Nobody deserved that attack regardless of who it was. Arkady is looking for scapegoats and that's not going to help any of us. And he out and out threatened mutiny, did he not? As if we were not in a bad enough situation...."

Kat went back through her notes, and flipped through them quickly. There were some questions regarding authority, and even about how things could unravel being so far away from Starfleet. She could see that the interpretation could be taken that way...

"He challenged you to consider your authority, and to consider the consequences of the actions of those on the Bridge when we all almost died." She took a deep breath, remembering how she held the life of Security Chief Regan in her hands, guided by the commanding voice of the Doctor.

"It sounded a lot like the beginnings of mutiny... or dissension... or both..."

"He specifically said I was not the kip'tin," Gary replied doing his best to imitate Arkady, hoping that would spark a laugh in KAT.

Her face twisted into a wry grin, and her eyes sparkled a little. "Well, that's true too. Although he did try to have a discrete conversation with you before he went... ballistic..." for lack of a better term...

"Yes, he did. However, he was too impatient to wait. I am getting the impression that he believes that he runs the ship and has for some time. Maybe that's just me, though. He's a good doctor but there's something off about him ever since the war."

"Off?" She looked at Gary and her confusion was plain on her face. "Then why is he aboard, if you don't mind my asking?"

He had interaction with the crew every single day, treating them for everything from a simple hangnail to something deeper and more far reaching.

He held the private thoughts and secrets of every crew member... not something she wished to consider with her own prescription. She flexed the fingers of her right hand again and she felt two hot spots form on each cheek.

"He passed the psychological exams and he is a darn good doctor. Add that to the fact that he was with me in the war...." He shrugged. "However, I am sure that he would know how to bypass it. He's a shrewd cuss."

"Then there's got to be a way to keep your friends close but your perceived enemies closer." She shrugged. "Take his views under consideration. And ask him... work with him. Bury the hatchet so to speak before it's buried hilt deep somewhere you might need his professional services for..."

Kat's face was serene, her eyes were concerned and her face slowly cooled. "For the good of the ship, perhaps. Or at least keep the lines of communication open."

"I meant what I said, KAT. I will forgive his outburst in this particular meeting but this can't continue. He has valid points and I will be incorporating them into the announcement. But, as I was discussing with Ensign Flowers, and she agreed, there has to be a structure. People need it. Otherwise we would have chaos."

He sighed. "God, KAT, I have so many ideas about what to do to keep us alive and viable as a species out here. And I can tell you right now that people will not likely enjoy some of them."

"You can never please everyone all the time," Kat said and nodded. "There are a lot of things to consider to keep us all alive out here."

"Yes there are. However, if people scare, and they are definitely scared now, and the wrong person uses that fear to create a situation, none of us are going to survive."

He sighed again and rubbed his temples. "God, KAT, remind me to not think of anymore hypotheticals. They have an uncanny way of occurring, it seems."

"I will," she said softly and pushed his PADD away from her. "So, stop thinking for a moment, and sit down. Take this time for yourself. A few moments at least?"

She took in his stress and stood up, moving to him. "What can I get you to at least relax a moment?" Her eyebrows raised and she looked at him. Nothing in her personal memory had ever pushed him to this level.

"Or at least get you to sit down?"

"I don't know, KAT. I don't know." He rubbed his temples more. "I do know that I have to be stronger and more in touch with everyone now than ever before. Not to mention I will have to put in shifts on Engineering, not that that is not fun, it is but I don't see much sleep in my future."

He looked up at KAT. "I'm sorry that I am throwing this all at you."

She shrugged and nodded. "I'm your Yeoman, Captain. Throwing all this at me is MY job."

"You do it well, KAT. But you have more on your mind. Let me have it."

"I'm worried." She shrugged again. "About the steps we take so soon after we've been stranded."

Pushing a hand through her hair, some of it came loose. "Whatever happens now, and in the next few days will set us on a path we might find it hard to come back from."

"That is why I feel that things have to be done right. I need you now more than ever, KAT."

"Of course, Captain," Kat said professionally. "Now, please, sit down. Let me get you something. How long has it been since you ate?"

"Since before we ended up here, I think." He then grinned at KAT and in a playful angry tone said, "And if you're going to play nurse to me, call me Gary, God damn it."

Rolling her eyes she sighed. "Fine, Gary. Now let me get you something to eat." She commed the mess... Ordering Gary his favorite meal, and artfully dodged any other questions.

Gary snorted. "You going to force feed me too?"

"If I have to." She quirked an eyebrow at him. "Don't test me..."

Gary raised his hands in a surrender motion. "Fine, fine! I give! You win! I'll eat. But you talk. You're avoiding my questions and that's not like you."

"I'm not sure how useful I can be to you, Captain," she said softly. "I know how to take care of things like this... I know I want to do more, be more. But this isn't the time or the place to test my limits while the ship might suffer."

"KAT, you can do more and be more. I know that you're invaluable to me. And fortunately, or unfortunately, everyone is going to have to test their limits. There's no backup anymore. We're all going to have to learn new skills. And, you, my dear, know everything about everyone and that makes you extremely important."

She nodded, eyelids blinking rapidly as though staving off an uncharacteristic burst of emotion. "Thank you," she said softly. "I think I just need to... punch a few bags in the Gym. And I'll be fine."

"Come here, KAT," Gary told her tenderly.

"I'm fine, Captain." She cleared her throat softly and looked down.

"Don't start that with me, KAT. We know each other better than anyone else on this ship." He rose and moved over to KAT and embraced her. "We're going to be OK."

She nodded and leaned her head on his chest, face down, nose pressing into his uniform. "We'll be fine," she mumbled, and her right fist clenched. She had to believe him. There was nothing else to do.

Gary continued to hold KAT and whispered, "I'm here for you. Let it out."

"Thank you." It was a whisper. "But isn't that my line?"

"It is but it does work both ways. You know that there's little I would not do for you," he told KAT softly.

"You're too kind," she whispered. Her eyes were dry, her voice low but clear, as though she were fighting some rising emotions. "I'm just glad that Chief Regan is all right."

"Me too. I need the Old Man more now than ever. I don't know what to expect of Lieutenant Devlin." He shook his head. "Listen to me and how easily I slip back into Captain mode. I'm sorry. This is KAT time."

Kat smiled. It was easier to discuss the whole ship and everyone else's disposition than to ever reveal her own concerns. "I wasn't sure I could save him." More self-doubt. How she hated that.

"You did great, KAT. You made me proud - stepping in when nobody else did or could."

Biting the inside of her lip, she shrugged against him, resting her forehead and trying to keep her breathing slow and steady. Anything to stop her from letting the tears flow. Not here. Not now.

In the Gym? Oh hell yes. For a reason? Of course. But not... no. Not when so much was at stake.

Gary stroked KAT's hair and said, "I've got you. Let it out. Let it all out, KAT."

One shudder, and her shoulder's shook. "I'm sorry, Sir... I'm trying to keep it together..." So hard... she was trying so hard, but the tighter she clenched her teeth, the quicker the tears slid between her closed eyelids.

Some clung to her eyelashes, and rolled down her cheeks. She kept her arms resolutely down by her sides and she fought every step of the way.

Gary slowly held KAT a little back from him. Taking one hand, he gently wiped some of the tears from her face. "Would you prefer me to hold you or get a cloth to wipe your tears?" he asked as he gave KAT a small kiss on the forehead.

Kat flinched from his touch for a moment, swallowing self-consciously. "I can do that, Captain," she said, voice thick with emotion, still straining to keep professional.

"Gary," he reminded her. "And you will do no such thing." He gave her another kiss on the forehead and wiped some more tears with his hand. After he was sure that she was going to stay put, he moved to a cabinet and got a cloth.

"Gary," she whispered and raised a hand to her face. Her cheeks were warm to the touch. "Some Yeoman I am, huh?" Her voice cracked and she buried her face in her hands as the tears broke free.

Gary came back to KAT and completely embraced her, giving her a kiss on the top of her head. "You're the best Yeoman that anyone could ask for, KAT. This is tough on all of us."

She laughed harshly, and shook her head against him. "Falling apart when you need me most. How is that the best, Captain... Gary... oh damn it all..." She sounded exasperated.

Gary chuckled lightly, holding her tighter. "Best to get it out of the way now so you can be bright eyed and bushy tailed again sooner."

At that very moment, the door opened and Gary instinctively backed away from KAT. A young man came in and said, "I believe that you ordered this meal."

"Of course," she turned away from them both and moved to appear to be looking out of the view port. "Please place it on the table. I'll take care of the rest. Thank you."

The young man gave KAT a questioning glance but said nothing as he placed the meal on the conference table and then departed with a second look at KAT and Gary.

She waited until she heard the door close and wiped her face with the back of her sleeve. "I'll leave you to your meal, Captain," she said firmly and leaned over to grab her PADD, right hand clenching and unclenching.

Gary gave KAT a stern look and he said, "You are not going anywhere, Karina Alicia Tell. You are going to sit your little butt down next to me and you are going to talk and maybe eat some with me."

"I think, for appearances sake, Captain, I should go."

"KAT, the damage is done, if any is done at all." He took KAT back into his arms and looked deeply into her eyes as he softly told her, "It is my honor to take care of you for awhile."

She shook her head, and sighed deeply. "That's my job. Not yours. And you should eat in peace, not with a blubbering idiot." Hell, she didn't even want to be around herself at the moment.

"My job is the safety and welfare of my crew and you are the most important part of my crew." Without thinking, he bent in and kissed KAT on the lips.

Blinking in surprise, her hand immediately went to her mouth. She turned a fresh shade of red, and took a step back. "I... Captain. I really should go." Her heart was thumping in her chest, and she wanted to distance herself from a scandal that was sure to fall upon him.

And the backlash from his XO besides. This would never do for him to look this way to the crew. Especially not now.

"No you shouldn't," he told KAT. He put his arm around her and tried leading her to the chairs at the table. "We have much yet to discuss. Please," his eyes looked at her pleading.

She sighed heavily and let him move her, her PADD clutched in her hand like a shield. She should never have let her guard down, never should have opened up... she was full of self-admonishments and sat heavily in a chair.

"Of course, Captain," she said softly, placing the PADD on the table, ready to take notes.

"Gary," he reminded KAT. "We are alone and you may be my Yeoman but you are also my friend. You need to let me be there for you. Do not shut me out now."

"Gary," she repeated. "I'll try." She raised the lid on his meal tray. "But I'm used to taking care of things. Not being taken care of." Her jaw clenched. "I'll try." It was softer, and her focus was on the meal. It was safer.

Gary chuckled. "OK. You take care of me while I take care of you, if that helps." He looked deep into her eyes and tenderly continued. "Alright, KAT, so what else is bothering you?"

Shaking her head, she shrugged, meeting his eyes easily. A kiss wasn't enough to make her shy away from her duty.

"I find it a little... disconcerting that the Engineers from down below who were on shift when... I accompanied the Doctor... many of them are no longer on rotation..." Or dead.

"You suspect something?" Gary inquired as he started to eat.

"Quite possibly," Kat said. "I just find it more than just a coincidence."

"Your intuition has always served both of us well. But that was before we ended up in this galaxy. Do you suspect he and his little group have been planning something for longer? And if so what and for what purpose?"

She shook her head once. "I didn't feel that," Kat said. "I was just surprised that they attempted such a thing. And that... most of them are gone now. I wonder if someone had a hand in cleaning house in Engineering."

Her face screwed up in some confusion. "Maybe it's just my imagination. I can't think why anyone would do such a thing to the crew."

"I believe in your observations, so I do not believe it is your imagination, KAT." He put his hand on hers to reassure her as he ate another bite. "Go on."

Kat left her hand where it was. "I don't know." She thought back to the attack. "I wasn't meant to go with him, Ca... Gary. And the Chief... coming down there... and the Doctor helping."

She smiled for just a moment. "I was very lucky that they were there."

"I don't believe in luck. He also suggested that very moment to go down and check for radioactivity in Engineering despite no reported issues. I think you are right. Either it a very unusual coincidence or it was planned."

"But I wasn't expected to go with him, Captain." Kat considered it. "How could something so impulsive have been planned? I mean... really...."

"Maybe so he could endear himself to you and you might tell him what I was thinking or he could plant ideas in your head that might get to me because he knows that I value your opinion so highly."

Kat's face looked more confused than ever. "I highly doubt that." She disagreed. "I'm not that important. Really."

"You are and anyone with eyes could tell that. I tell you everything and I heed your counsel as much as any of my Chiefs. Sjet is not stupid."

"No, he isn't," said Kat. "I've just only thought of doing my duty, and never really considered the import of my doing so."

"And you do your duty extremely well. There's a reason that I picked you over everyone else." He left his food and took KAT's PADD away from her and put it on the table. He took both of her hands in his and while deeply looking into her eyes said, "I could not do what I do without you. You know that, right?"

"Please, just eat, Gary." She smiled, and squeezed his hands gently. "I'm fine, really."

"You're a rotten liar, well, at least to me. If you were alright, you would not have been bawling a few minutes ago. Keep telling me what is on your mind, even if it is work related." He kept holding KAT's hands.

"I appreciate this, Gary. I really do. But my head's a jumble of worry... about doing the right thing, about meeting and exceeding expectations, about helping where it's needed, and above all, not disappointing you."

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm not sure with all of the changes that are coming, that I can find the best way to contribute."

Looking at his plate, she grabbed a piece from it, and ate it quickly. "And most of all, I hope to be able to maintain an air of professionalism with the crew that will keep their morale up."

"What changes concern you, KAT? All I know is that with you by my side, there is no doubt that we can accomplish anything that we need to. You've never let me down and I don't think you ever could." He gave her a smile as she took her hand away to snitch some food for herself.

She laughed. "Ah, well, if I knew them all, I wouldn't probably be so concerned." She licked her fingers clean and then placed it back in his deliberately. "I hope to never make you think that I could."

Gary noticed that KAT put her hand back in his but made no comment. He smiled as he felt she was regaining her normal composure. "So, good. It is settled. You can't possibly let me down. As to the potential changes, I will want to talk about them with you at length because I have a lot of ideas and you often have a better feel for the crew than I."

"Of course," she said, and smiled. "I'm not so sure about that, but well, I do try."

"You succeed," he told her with a winning smile. "Glad to see that bright smile of yours again."

Kat laughed. "You do this for a living, do you Gary?" she asked softly. "Captain starships and bolster yeoman's self-confidence?" She rolled her eyes. "What do you do for an encore? Karaoke?"

"I am certain that you have heard me sing. Do you really want that, KAT?" he asked with a short laugh.

One finger on his lips and she shook her head slowly. "No. No, I don't."

She stood then, and looked at his plate. "You're almost done, and I think we'd best schedule another meeting. Or at least let it wait until before shift."

"As you wish, KAT." He stood up and took her in her arms and whispered, "Thank you."

She hugged him gently for a moment, and then stepped back to look up into his face. "You're welcome."

"Thank you."

"I was thanking you for trusting me and opening up. I know that is always hard for you. I'm glad you know I will always be there for you. And, you're welcome. But before you leave, you might want to use a wet cloth to freshen up. You don't want extra rumors on the Ticker Tape."

Nodding, she moved to get a cloth. "Do you mind?" she asked gently.

"No," Gary said letting go of her.

She wet the cloth and then handed it to him. "Thank you."

Gary took the cloth and started wiping KAT's face. He inspected it closely and after determining that she looked as good as when she arrived, he gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Good as new."

"Better than," she said and took the cloth, folding it carefully. One hand reached up to cup his cheek briefly and then she turned, swept up her PADD and walked to the door. Every inch the professional Yeoman who was only a shadow of her former self before.

Gary watched KAT endearingly. "I expect that I will see you at the end of shift with all the usual reports."

"Of course, Captain," she said as she stood before the door. "Gary," she said almost as an afterthought and she took the last step, disappearing out into the corridor as the door whispered shut.

Tags Anyone who feels like a Kat chat or Gary convo or anyone at all, really

(A JP brought to you by Captain Gary and Yeoman Kat)

[Azaria]

A low, intermittent noise greeted his ears as consciousness slowly returned.

He'd been having an interesting dream about a hammerhead yak riding a hammerhead whale coming to his rescue.... the hell?.... when the sound intruded.

That, combined with the full ache in his arms from an intravenous drip, and the heavy smell of disinfectant told him immediately that he was in sick bay. The ache in his knees told him he'd been prone for some time, but the lack of sore spots indicated he hadn't been immobile for more than a day or two.

His eyes attempted to open, but felt like they were glued together with thick paste. He'd been crying while unconscious? God help him if Gary saw that, the kid would rag on him for years...

Regan's eyes flew open.

The low beep began to speed up and a small alarm went off as Regan's heart began to race.

Where were they? (How are we still alive?) What is the ship's status? (Seriously, we got sucked into a fucking quiznard worm thing-err.how the Jack are we alive?)

A hand firmly pushed Regan back from the half sitting position he'd unknowingly risen to. The alarm was silenced and a voice broke through the old man's panicked thoughts.

Tag - arkady?

[Sjet]

"You are not in Kansas any more."

The fact that the thick accent mutilated the pronunciation to a 'kin-ass' in stead of the great rectangular states name, went some way towards identifying the speaker. Arkady stood in the door way to one of only three private rooms the small sick bay had, but even calling the small cubby hole of a space a 'room' was being generous. It was a minor miracle of engineering that had seen equipment shelved, folded, compressed and in some cases smashed together into bizarre hybrids that allowed the room to support the life of a single occupant. Of course how the Daedalus ship's designers had come upon the number three as the number of rooms required for a crew of over two hundred was anyone's guess. Then again any disaster that left four crew members in need of bed rest probably wasn't doing the ship as a whole any favours.

"You have questions." Arkady went on to say from the door, as he glanced down at the computer tablet cradled there he continued to talk "In order of presumed significant: casualties were light all things considered, ship is in relatively good shape, the Pin Wheel Galaxy and Gary has not been to see you yet. Oh and your underling, Devlin, is currently running your department: worry if you will."

He reached into a pocket and pulled out a small foil sachet, tossing it onto Regan's bed.

"Is small lemon scented towelet, like one you get on Luna/Earth shuttle. I'd have warmed it up but the sterilising kiln is busy." Arkady explained as he gestured to his own face "For your ocular discharge. Once you've cleaned that away I want you tell me how you feel: any loss of mobility, persistent pain? How's that vision of yours? Same list I go through with you every year when you miss your check up and I have to send Gunther to find you."

Nurse Gunther Grisswald was the sort of man you knew, just from the sound of his name, came from a proud family of no neck leg breakers. All the members of his stout family tree were imposing specimens of the species, with hands the size and shape of festive hams. And the joke around the mess hall coffee machine was that Gunther's lack of a voice was either because he sang soprano or that Arkady had removed it before they shipped out. All that could be said was that when Gunther went on errands, people were very polite to him and always made sure that if there was a argument to be had they conceded to the mute mountain of muscle. Had the fact be known that Gunther had once been known to pass out because of being stung by a bee, Arkady would have had a lot more people miss out on their year medical check up.

TAG-Regan, or I send in Gunther.

Dr Arkady Sjet
Chief Physician
USS Horizon

[Sjet]

"You have questions." Arkady went on to say from the door, as he glanced down at the computer tablet cradled there he continued to talk "In order of presumed significant: casualties were light all things considered, ship is in relatively good shape, the Pin Wheel Galaxy and Gary has not been to see you yet. Oh and your underling, Devlin, is currently running your department: worry if you will."

He reached into a pocket and pulled out a small foil sachet, tossing it onto Regan's bed.

"Is small lemon scented towelet, like one you get on Luna/Earth shuttle. I'd have warmed it up but the sterilizing kiln is busy." Arkady explained as he gestured to his own face "For your ocular discharge. Once you've cleaned that away I want you tell me how you feel: any loss of mobility, persistent pain? How's that vision of yours? Same list I go through with you every year when you miss your check up and I have to send Gunther to find you."


Regan grunted and tore into the foil package, using the minute or so it took to clear his eyes to get his heart back under control.

"Give me a minute to get up and piss and I'll be fine," he said as he tossed the used cloth and package into the tiny garbage pail by the bed. "My back teeth are floating."

Pin Wheel Galaxy? Regan shook his head as he slowly pushed himself up to a sitting position and set about wiggling his toes awake. Great, he sighed to himself, first waking moments in a new galaxy and my ass is asleep.

"Any of these gizmos a toilet, or do I need to use the bucket?"

Arkady pointed with a less than delicate finger towards a strange conical device that hung from the wall, attached on its narrow end to a small hose. Even two hundred years after Gagarin went into orbit, the bodily functions and processes that human beings brought with them still lead to certain problems. Unlike the officer's quarters where a more traditional throne was on offer, the sickbay was built with micro gravity in mind. Its....attachment...was as dignified a thing as it could be.

After a long and relaxing pee, the Chief felt much better. "Well, lets run through the check list Doc - I'm still a crotchety old man, I have aches and pains but nothing irregular... a bit tight in the chest, but since I have a good idea of what sent me here I'm not surprised. My eyes are shit, I turn most legumes instantaneously into chemical agents, and my knee still does that weird popping thing it has done since... when was that? I got tore up by that thing at that place... you gave me an ice pack and an ibuprofen and told me to 'suck it up, buttercup'...? Man, you were just a kid then!"

"Far Vladivostok." Arkady murmured, nodding slowly as the memory floated slowly back to him of the transhipment station orbiting above Neptune "In my defence I was just an orderly then, the war had not quite gotten so bad they were giving out commissioned ranks to orphans from the Rust Works. And considering that half the crew compliment of that transport were being pulled out in body bags I would say you were lucky to have orderly with medical training and not grave digger with shovel."

Arkady let out a sigh.

"And yet here I am, a Martian doctor far from home, and there is little more now that I can do but: how you say? Suck it up?" he asked with a raised eye brow. He said that last bit with a growl to his words, the phrase bringing to mind Gary's less than subtle approaches to interdepartmental communication. Or if not communication, then a very blunt 'Do as I say' commandment from the heights of his Olympian bridge. Arkady reached up and rubbed his eyes slowly.

"Sorry...it has been, as you say, a long day." He muttered.

"Da," Regan intoned with a slight smirk. "I can imagine."

Slowly he shifted his weight off the bed and to his feet. The tightness in his chest fluctuated, sending his head into spirals, but he held out until the ship stopped doing loop-de-loops. "You're being extra broody, Doc. Is it me thats so bad off, or the situation that has you like this?"

"You are like old horse: when you're dead, you're dead. Everything else is minor miracle. You might feel weak for a few days, light headed for a few more. Normally I would have you on thinners and cardiac growth hormones to repair the damage to your heart, but we are going to have to let nature take its course. Need to stock pile the drug we have on hand for long duration." Arkady said slowly, mulling his words about as he rubbed his chin with one hand. After a moment of thought he came to a decision.

"Gary is slow to come to terms with our new reality. He has accepted that we are in new galaxy, that our odds of returning home are slim to none existent. This he has taken in stride." he said bitterly, before just shaking his head sadly "Alas he has yet to grasp that there is a new social regime that must be addressed. A wound in the ship that cannot be ordered sealed by simple command. He thinks everything has remained the same, save for our location. That this is Starfleet ship, with Starfleet crew that will follow orders unquestionably."

He closed his eyes, and for a moment the two men were contemporaries not separated by decades.

"I tried to open his eyes to that fact: I begged him to listen to the crew, to treat them as family grieving a loss. Nyet. He will not listen to me now, if he ever did. He see's jealous rival eager to take his place, to rule in his stead. Once that idea was in his head he could not past it, he could not hear." Arkady said, his voice light but tinged by sadness "I was not as clear as I could be. I thought, as he was a survivor of the Battle of Charon I would be in the company of someone who understood fellowship and loss."

He looked at Regan, am fire of rage twinkling in the back of his eyes.

"He not only ignores council of man who will not rubber stamp his choices without thought, but he forsakes the opinions and wills of every man and woman who stood with him at Charon and bought a minute of time with every life extinguished-!" Arkady cut himself off, clamping his jaw firmly shut before he spoke again "Were I the man I was before Charon, I would have demanded satisfaction from him. I would have raised my fists; these fists-"

He held them up, turning the whitened knuckled slowly in the light.

"-against a man who I would call brother. The man who pulled me from that escape pod is not the man who sits on deck one today. That man would not have discounted the welfare of his crew." His voice went slightly hollow "I do not know this man whom is called Captain now. I thought I did but..."

Silence fell between the two men, broody and dark.

"Fuck, man," Regan finally said with a deep exhalation. "I don't know what to tell you - I just woke up. I don't know what the fuck is going on... but the kid, the Captain, he had a rough go since Charon. His wife being... ill... the divorce... He hopped onto the 'Bonny to get away from that, you know?"

"Haven't we all had it 'rough' since Charon? So quickly after the war ended we survivors, the veterans, were granted our walking papers: to replace a Starfleet that had its blood up with one that had been raised in the glow of a hard won peace. There is no country for old men, no peace for old soldiers. Men like you and I are here out of sympathy: you at least kept your rank, whilst my less than official promotions were discounted." He shrugged, rubbing a hand over his bare uniform shoulders as though dusting them off "But here we are, granted one more chance to be useful but in far away place. You and me, seven other's as well: all given a chance to serve our nation one last time. They chose their poster boy well."

Regan snorted, "You're really not good at making people feel better, doc."

He meant it as a joke, but in truth the Martian's anger was sending his own blood pressure up. Anger can be infectious.
A little part of Regan wanted to join Arkady's brooding misery and lay his troubles at the captain's feet - okay, lets be honest, a big part of him did - but he held off. He didn't know what the hell was going on, he needed to see what was happening himself. His job was to play devil's advocate more often than not. To sniff out threats before they threaten.

He needed to nudge the conversation in a different direction.

"People change, grow apart... but him not taking advice, that doesn't sound like him." Regan said at last with a flourish of his hands. "I don't know what to say... we've been flung into a different galaxy... and he's the type to pin any failures on himself... he could just be a little fucked in the brain. In shock. Fuck, I'd be surprised if anyone on this boat isn't losing their shit right about now."

"And that is why I worry!" Arkady said, snapping his fingers urgently "There are men and women who will now never see their families again, who will never see their loved ones again! Men and women who know a great deal about antimatter and ship electrical systems. You and I have both been on wounded star ships before, either as crew or as SAR team: a plasma conduit that overloads can incinerate a man in seconds. A fusion plant loosing its magnetic bottle can do same to entire ship."

He looked into Regan's eyes.

"And that is if we do not forget that some people are not suicidal. Some will just want revenge on the woman who sent us here, who lured our glorious leader into a foolhardy investigation." Arkady muttered grimly "This is our crucible. And Gary is woefully ill-equipped to handle it!"

A tiny klaxon on a machine attached to Regan's chest began squealing.

"Arkady, stop. Just... gimme a minute. Give me a break - a time out." Regan's face was pale and sweaty, but his hand didn't shake as he pointed a finger at the angry Martian. "You know me, you know my job. I am very good at my job. You need to back off and let me pass out for a few hours, then give me whatever I will need to get back to my job - Kapiche?"

"Da, da..." the Russian said a little breathlessly, running a hand through his hair as he did so "I will do that."

"We'll talk again later, but I can't talk with you like this without knowing what is going on. I can't."

"Do not take too long my old friend." Arkady said, brushing a finger over the light panel, causing the lights to dim slightly “We are closer to the edge than I like to admit."

“Arkady,” Regan looked at him with a mix of sadness, exhaustion and determination on his weathered faced. “If you’re this upset, we’re closer than anyone would admit. And probably more screwed than anyone knows.”

The old man closed his eyes as he leaned back into his uncomfortable pillow and called softly after him, “Be good.”

Arkady said nothing as he watched the old man, now more aged than he had ever seen him before, fall slowly ito sleep. He did not speak to allow Regan to rest: he did so because he had to much respect for him to lie to his face. What place was the edge of madness for the deeds of good men? He looked up, staring at the spot in the decks where he knew Gary would be.

What place in madness indeed...

A JP brought to you by Arkady and Regan. As well as the letters I C U.